Archive for April, 2015

So the “spermsicle” as Dave put it, is now on ice for another year. I’m currently on a leave of absence from work from stress due to all this stuff happening. Hoping to get at least some sickness EI benefits, as it looks like short term disability will definitely be denied again, even if I appeal. One kind of needs to be on medications, bedridden or seeing a professional regularly to qualify, I guess. Incapacitated. Now, if I do somehow get pregnant, I have to work 600 hours somewhere that deducts EI, to be eligible to take sick benefits again, if I get sick before I give birth, or for maternity leave benefits if I don’t.

I inquired about how many donor sperm straws/vials there are, and how to proceed. They told me there is only one vial, and that it only would be a 20% maximum chance at a baby if it’s a therapeutic donor insemination (TDI). Half the chance of IVF, if we’re lucky, so they suggested IVF for this as well, and gave me requisitions for blood tests (specific time in my cycle for mine, Dave’s is done already) plus pelvic exam/pap for me. In that case, if we’re doing IVF, for an extra $1500 (+$250 for a detailed semen analysis) we might as well just go with ICSI with Dave’s sperm. I’ve seen so many failed cycles (both inseminations and IVF) on the secret Facebook group for the local fertility clinic, that it worries me quite a bit. I’ve had offers to help me set up crowd funding and fundraisers for it, which I am eternally grateful for. It will have to be concurrent to, or after the treatment now, as we’re now on a time constraint.

If all else fails, there are still a couple of male friends willing to make donations. Unorthodox, perhaps, but we are open minded, and had discussed it from the outset. ┬áJust don’t know how many donations would need to be made for one to stick, not to mention timing (the stuff is only viable for an hour unless it’s frozen). If only the local fertility clinic would allow known embryo donations. There is at least one couple I know of who wants to do this in the secret group I am a part of. Frozen Embryo Transfer is relatively cost efficient, even more so than TDI, I believe.

The financial end of all this kind of puts a wrench in the wedding we were planning on having at the local scifi & fantasy convention at the end of October 2015; we met through its Facebook group. If we had been able to do it, it would have been the first (there was a previous renewal of vows).

Still might try, but it will have to be even smaller than I’d wanted, which is disappointing. It was smallish enough as it is but, though I do seem to have a list of 150 guests, not all will stay through the ceremony plus the reception dinner (I’d suggested potluck, the organizer has suggested a buffet, but maybe now it can only be nibbly things) & dance, which I’d hoped to be Karaoke mashup themed, but we know another good DJ who plays mashups sometimes and, if worse came to worst, I’d just make a playlist. Or we could just crash the ball downstairs on the same night in the Great Hall.

We were going to have a sweet geek wedding and mashup The Princess Bride and Spaceballs, with some other geeky bits thrown in. Some of our friends have been awesome in offering to do some things for us for free or reduced rates.

Our friends in Cape Breton, she has been approved for funding to go to NSCC. She will find out at the end of the week which one she can go to. If the program she is taking has spaces locally to her, she will be attending there and not moving here until she is done. I don’t know how long the course is, but that means no duplex. However, if by some fluke they approve her for it here, her fiance is working somewhere there that he can transfer up here, as they are looking for people here as well.


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